Self-care is the choosing of healthy actions or activities that will meet my emotional, mental, physicial, and spiritual needs. We probably do some of this already, but just don’t call it “self-care”. Going to the gym, reading recovery material, journaling, meditating, and listening to music could all be considered self-care.
Why do we need to focus on self-care?
It seemed strange at first to hear so many recommendations and reminders for me to do self-care. But it made sense as I realized that I spent so many years in unhealthy actions, that I never learned healthy ways to help me manage my stress, my anxiety, my fears. I also realized that I am prone to NOT do self-care as I don’t feel that I am worth it, that I need to be punished, or that I don’t deserve it. As I begin to move away from using lust and my sexual addiction as a way of coping with life, I need new, healthy ways to deal with the emotions and feelings that normal people feel and deal with.
The Realms of Me
I am a complex person with several interconnected realms in my life: Physical, Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual. Doing self-care that addresses one (such a going to gym) will obviously benefit my Physical realm but can also help me process emotional stress and anxiety. Meditating and prayer can likewise help my body feel less stress as I process issues and difficulties in a healthy way. Everyone will be slightly different and will find different things that work most effectively for you. Here are some ideas and suggestions:
Physical
- Brisk walking
- Jogging or running
- Going to the gym
- Biking
- Yard work
Mental
- Doing crosswords or sudoku
- Learn a new skill or hobby
- Listen to TEDtalks or podcasts
- Read stimulating or challenging books/articles
Emotional
- Read encouraging books
- Listen to uplifting podcasts
- Get into community (friends, family)
- Listen to your favorite music
- Watch a favorite funny movie (laugh)
Spiritual
- Journal your thoughts
- Read inspirational literature
- Attend worship with others
- Communicate with your Higher Power (pray and listen)
- Pick a thought or concept to meditate on during the day